There's been another real life will of God moment going on this past week. Remember from a few posts ago, "will of God moments" in life are those moments of painful growth, trials we don't understand or difficult course corrections. They are the moments when God prunes us, shapes us, and refines us. Where He says very plainly, "I know what I want you to be and I know what I want you to do and although you don't see it now, this will lead you down the path of happiness." In order to understand this post at all and what I'm talking about, you're gonna need to watch this short video entitled "The Will of God."
Also, in order for me to share this experience and what I have learned from it, we'll need to take a trip down memory lane so that I can fill you in on some events that led to this moment. The best way I can do this is to write it as if I had a journal entry for each of them. If I had them they would read something like this:
October 5th, 2012Holy moly!!! You will not believe what happened this morning! The
prophet Thomas S. Monson spoke and...........CHANGED THE AGE FOR MISSIONARY SERVICE!!! I know it was revelation from God and I am so excited for all that will accompany this historic event! Check this: young men can now go at 18 yrs old instead 19 and I am not pulling your leg young women can now go at 19 instead of 21. Oh my goodness! Am I supposed to go on a mission?? And if I do when?? I feel the spirit saying I should go but I have been working so hard for my
interior design degree!...is it really my turn to go?
October 16th, 2012
I've still been thinking an awful awful lot about serving a mission.
But it seems like the worst timing ever! I am loving school right
now, IT IS SO HARD but it has been the best semester ever! I am
actually pulling good grades and understanding the classes. My
projects have never looked better, I actually feel slightly
successful. I haven't asked The Lord yet if I should serve....I'm
scared what the answer will be!! But I'm always thinking about it and
weighing my options...
interior design degree!...is it really my turn to go?
 |
| Courtesy of Interior Design Facebook |
I've still been thinking an awful awful lot about serving a mission.
But it seems like the worst timing ever! I am loving school right
now, IT IS SO HARD but it has been the best semester ever! I am
actually pulling good grades and understanding the classes. My
projects have never looked better, I actually feel slightly
successful. I haven't asked The Lord yet if I should serve....I'm
scared what the answer will be!! But I'm always thinking about it and
weighing my options...
October 23rd, 2012
Today we found out the the INTERIOR DESIGN PROGRAM IS GETTING
CUT!!!!!!!!! Everyone in the program will be cycled through...but if
I leave on my mission I won't be back in time to tag on the last
class, so I'm thinking this must be my answer that I need to stay and
finish my education now...
October 24th, 2012
It has seriously been the worst day ever. Urgh! School was so
stressful! My teachers were on my case!! I feel so much anxiety! It's
just been one of those days. I just spent the last 30 minutes bawling
in my car before coming in. It's now 2am and I was at school from
7:30am till 1:30am and I am so so tired! I'm going to say my prayer
quick and get to bed!
Later
I said my prayer and long story short, I finally asked if I should go
on a mission and...my answer was YES and GO ASAP!!!!!
It was such a sacred experience receiving that answer. I've never
felt the spirit stronger. My confirmation was when that terrible
day...was washed away in one whoosh and in it's place was pure joy at
even just the thought of serving Heavenly Father! So...I'm going!!!!
I don't know what this will mean for school but who cares?? When The
Lord says go, I gotta go!
March 20th 2014
It has seriously been the worst day ever. Urgh! School was so
stressful! My teachers were on my case!! I feel so much anxiety! It's
just been one of those days. I just spent the last 30 minutes bawling
in my car before coming in. It's now 2am and I was at school from
7:30am till 1:30am and I am so so tired! I'm going to say my prayer quick and get to bed!
Later
I said my prayer and long story short, I finally asked if I should go
on a mission and...my answer was YES and GO ASAP!!!!!
It was such a sacred experience receiving that answer. I've never
felt the spirit stronger. My confirmation was when that terrible
day...was washed away in one whoosh and in it's place was pure joy at
even just the thought of serving Heavenly Father! So...I'm going!!!!
I don't know what this will mean for school but who cares?? When The
Lord says go, I gotta go!
 |
| Sister Gillett, Mama G, and me! |
My my how time flies! This has been the best year of my life!! I'm so glad I came out, I know it was the right thing. I have met the most incredible people. People who I love and who have changed my life! I have learned so much in their service. I have learned who God is and who Jesus Christ is. My mission is irreplaceable...but...As my mission heads down the back stretch I'm reminded that soon I'll have to go back home and I need figure out what in the world I am going to do about school. I was planning on finishing my associates in a semester and then transferring to where ever will take the most of my interior design credits, but then a member of the congregation I was talking to said oh no! Use those credits and just get any degree you can out of them. Finish and then you can go on with your eduction from there. Now I feel very excited like I will be able to stay at BYU-Idaho!
April 21st 2014
I don't know why I believed that lady from church! What can I say??
She used a lot of fancy words!! I received permission
to call an academic advisor at school to get some counsel on
possible paths to earning a degree. After an hour wait on hold and
45 min talking to this really sweet lady beating around the bush, I
cut in and point blank said, "are you telling me that my 80 credits of
Interior Design are completely worthless now at BYU-I?" There was a
pause and she affirmed that it was true and that my best option would
be to finish my associates and transfer. I am not going to lie, to
me, it was a big deal, a big pill to swallow, another big course
correction in my life. Just Big! I choked back tears while the lady apologized
and acknowledged that it must be very difficult to take in. I assured
her that I trusted my decision to serve The Lord, that I trusted His
course correction and that I KNOW He has a plan for me...and that I'm
just trying to figure out what the plan is exactly. She added her
testimony of it and that was our conversation. What will I do now?
So here we are back today. That was a real will of God moment. After I hung up the phone, my attitude about the situation was riding high and low the rest of the day. At the pinnacle I felt very frustrated. I felt just like the man from the will of God video. I felt like throwing my hat on MY cot! And shaking MY fists at the heavens and ask God how he could do this to me when I have tried so hard to serve him and do what he asks and now my life has no plan!! Then I heard the words in the video, "I am the gardener here and I know what I want you to do." I did feel the bitterness leave my soul as I again put my trust in him and accepted his love inspired course correction. I don't know what the plan is, but I trust in my God. I don't feel upset or angry, only faith. My future is as bright as my faith. I see great opportunities on my horizon and I know that the path I'm on has lead me to happiness and will continue to do so even if I sometimes don't see it, he does. I have people around me who love me. I have my Father in Heaven to guide me. I believe in and trust every will of God moment that happens in my life.
I know for some of you reading this post, you are going through far harder trials than this. To you I say, thanks for reading. I hope you know that God loves you, and the stuff going on in your life isn't a punishment or a haha moment on you. It really is God guiding you. He weeps with you. These "will of God" moments are hard. Life is hard. Plans change and courses get corrected. Turn towards Him and not away. Prayer has turned my will of God moments into opportunities for growth and happiness. You can talk to God like He's right there and tell Him how you are honestly feeling right now. "honesty is the root of spirituality." He is there. He hears and answers everyone of His child's prayers. This first step of faith in facing your difficulty will immediately, I promise, fill you heart with peace. I know because it did so with mine. This is what I have learned. Has it lifted your faith in anyway?
I don't know why I believed that lady from church! What can I say??
She used a lot of fancy words!! I received permission
to call an academic advisor at school to get some counsel on
possible paths to earning a degree. After an hour wait on hold and
45 min talking to this really sweet lady beating around the bush, I
cut in and point blank said, "are you telling me that my 80 credits of
Interior Design are completely worthless now at BYU-I?" There was a
pause and she affirmed that it was true and that my best option would
be to finish my associates and transfer. I am not going to lie, to
me, it was a big deal, a big pill to swallow, another big course
correction in my life. Just Big! I choked back tears while the lady apologized
and acknowledged that it must be very difficult to take in. I assured
her that I trusted my decision to serve The Lord, that I trusted His
course correction and that I KNOW He has a plan for me...and that I'm
just trying to figure out what the plan is exactly. She added her
testimony of it and that was our conversation. What will I do now?
I know for some of you reading this post, you are going through far harder trials than this. To you I say, thanks for reading. I hope you know that God loves you, and the stuff going on in your life isn't a punishment or a haha moment on you. It really is God guiding you. He weeps with you. These "will of God" moments are hard. Life is hard. Plans change and courses get corrected. Turn towards Him and not away. Prayer has turned my will of God moments into opportunities for growth and happiness. You can talk to God like He's right there and tell Him how you are honestly feeling right now. "honesty is the root of spirituality." He is there. He hears and answers everyone of His child's prayers. This first step of faith in facing your difficulty will immediately, I promise, fill you heart with peace. I know because it did so with mine. This is what I have learned. Has it lifted your faith in anyway?
Sent from my iPad
No comments:
Post a Comment